The Longest Shortest Time

Emotions as Words

Back when I first posted about the book Sasha and I were creating to help process her broken leg, I got a comment from my friend Margaret recommending that we read the “I Feel” books by Marcia Leonard. These tiny board books are not in print anymore, but you can find them easily through sellers on Amazon and eBay. The feelings in the series are Angry, Sad, Scared, and Happy.

Sasha has really latched on to these books and enjoys answering “yes” to the various questions, like, “Do loud noises frighten you?” (our segue into talking about windshield wipers and vacuums and the super scary saw they used to score the sides of her cast to allow room for her leg to grow) and “Do you get upset when Mommy or Daddy wants you to go to bed?” (our segue into talking about why sleeping can be hard). I actually have a theory that Sasha’s sleep disturbances and the loud scary saw are interrelated, which I’ll post about soon.

A couple days ago I got some proof that these concepts—words that describe big, overwhelming feelings—are sinking in. Her friend Freddy was playing with our cat at her yay-your-cast-really-finally-came-off-for-real party and the cat swiped at him. Normally our cat just gives a warning swipe, with his claws in, but Freddy shrieked and was sobbing pretty hard. He showed us his finger and there appeared to be blood. I felt horrible and we took Freddy to the bathroom to get washed up. Then I went to apply the Band-Aid and couldn’t find the wound. Turned out the “blood” had actually been raspberry juice from our celebratory raspberry muffins. (He still got a Band-Aid, of course.)

Sasha watched the whole thing unfold silently. Later that night she said to me, “Freddy sad. Freddy cry. He sad.” It took me a minute—it had been hours since the raspberry juice drama. But then I remembered. And it was so amazing to see that Sasha could put a word to the feelings she had witnessed in somebody else. She still hasn’t been able to tell me when she is feeling a certain emotion—she just throws things or cries—but I feel like we’re getting close. And on days when she is angry, she will request that I read the “Angry” book. I’m looking forward to the day that I can say, “Why are you angry?” and she will be able to tell me.

Do any of you have anecdotes to share about when your child made a breakthrough in being able to express his or her emotions in words?