The Longest Shortest Time

10 Movies That Won’t Make You Cry After Having a Baby

After you have a baby, you need stuff to watch, right? Stuff to entertain you—or just to zone out to—while feeding the baby, or during interminable jiggling sessions. Lots of us binge-watch TV shows. Movies are great, too. But the problem with movies is, so many of them make you cry. And crying is something we’re especially susceptible to, postpartum.

I asked (challenged, really) Kristen Meinzer and Rafer Guzman, hosts of the Movie Date podcast, to come up with 10 movies for new moms that wouldn’t make us cry. Kristen and Rafer each picked 5 movies and answered my question as part of their “Movie Therapy” series, in which they recommend movies to help people with their problems.

You can hear the results here:

Kristen tells me that she and Rafer usually agree on their Movie Therapy picks. But not this time!

Kristen Meinzer

Kristen Meinzer

Kristen went the EMPOWERED WOMAN route:

1. Pitch Perfect (2012)

2. Charlie’s Angels (2000)

3. Nine to Five (1980)

4. Showgirls (1995)

5. Some Like it Hot (1959)

Rafer Guzman

Rafer Guzman

Rafer went the BAD CHILDREN route:

1. The Parent Trap (1998)

2. The Bad Seed (1956)

3. Starstruck (1982)

4. Gloria (1980)

5. Paper Moon (1973)
Who’s right? Or is this a losing battle?
Listen for yourself and let us know! And if you’re in need of your own personal movie therapy, call the Movie Therapy hotline: (571-7MOVIES).

Have YOU found any movies that don’t make you cry after having a baby?
Tell us in the comments.

Photos: Alex Johnson; Movie Date logo: Steven Weinberg